Sometimes one must jump in head first for the fuller effect of the water's cooling hand.There's a time when one must look at her body and realize that those stretch marks are not unusually early for your weight. I know my weight now stands at 100 kilograms. That's more than the average man. I'm going to have to stop fooling myself, I am massive for my age. 19 years old, 5 ft 7". I'm nearly 20 and I have been large all my life, larger than all of my cousins, who are all older than me.
I look like I'm pregnant, full term kind of pregnant. I have stretchmarks and I don't have periods anymore, ever since I put myself on the pill. I could be pregnant and not even know, except I do know. I know it's not going anywhere after 9 months. I have to get rid of it. And giving birth is not an option here, either. It's not even fair.
I have myself when I look in the mirror and see the double chin trying desperately to flop down from where I have it clenched in my jaw. It's going to get worse, I know it. I am having trouble finding clothes now, at UK size 18 to 20, in between, depending on the brand and labels. I'm not a fat girl. I'm pretty, I know I am. I can usually get the hot guys I want when I want, so I'm not exactly a roly poly. Not yet. I will be.
So using nothing but a few lettuce leaves, some spices, a few chicken breasts and a yoga mat... I'm going to change this. I'm going to get myself to halve my weight. Halve it, so that I'll be thin, yes. I don't give two flying f***s if it's 'healthy' and whether I should do it or not. I'm going to and you should never tell a fat person to not get thin in the way they might want to. After all, I'd rather be thin and have health problems than fat and have health problems.
People think they can catch fatness. It may not be a logical thought but many people don't like to hang out with larger people because they think their eating habits might rub off on them and make them get overweight or obese too. It's hard. We know, "Just stop eating so much". Do you know how HARD that can be when you're too sad to be motivated? Yes, you care. But no, you can't stop, because it's all you know.
So when a fat person says they're going to do it in their way, let them, at least until they're healthy. Even if they don't have a reasonable target, if it's big... maybe even if they get halfway to their unnecessarily unreasonable target, at least that's still an achievement in their mind. In my mind, 25 kilos would be great, but halving my weight is a dream. And that's what I plan to do, even if it doesn't entirely happen, you know?
Let us go for the biggest goals, and then even a small goal to us will seem wonderful. So here I go, 30 sit ups a day, 30 squats. Let's start working the lower body fat off first. Then we can work up and out from there... Here we go.
